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I’m cooking tonight, for a guy. I’ve cooked for guys before but this is the first time that has also included the full disclosure: a guy I’m dating. I’ve never actually cooked for a guy that I’ve dated before. Plenty of the guys I see know I’m a good cook. It’s hard to hang out with me for too long before the topic of food arises. But none of them have had a meal especially prepared for them. This makes me anxious. Also, because I’m cooking at his place. Is it weird that I’m bringing my chef’s knife, tongs and a squeeze bottle for garnish along with me? It is, isn’t it? I just don’t know if he’ll have the things I need to properly prepare food. I mean, should I also bring kosher salt? I should, shouldn’t I?

We’re going to the grocery store when I get there so he’ll be buying all the ingredients and I’ll prepare them, but this also makes me antsy. What do I buy? What do I choose? How do I narrow down the selection into something I can make without having a menu already planned out for me? I think I’m going to get performance anxiety. Do you think actual chefs get this when they cook for a personal reason too?
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